🧊 Why We Numb — And How to Feel Again
Introduction: The Hidden Cost of Emotional Numbness
In a world that glorifies productivity, many people quietly live with emotional numbness—the sense of being detached from their feelings, their purpose, and even their own body. We often confuse this with laziness or burnout, but it’s really the body’s way of saying, “I don’t feel safe to feel.”
Whether you turn to work, food, alcohol, or endless scrolling, these are not signs of weakness—they’re survival strategies. As Dr. Gabor Maté explains, we must look beyond the behaviour and ask, “Not why the addiction, but why the pain?”
1. Why We Numb
Numbing occurs when emotional intensity exceeds what the nervous system believes it can handle. Rather than judging this, it helps to see it as your body protecting itself from emotional overload.
Most people were never taught how to process emotions safely. So when grief, anger, fear, or loneliness arise, the system instinctively presses pause. Unfortunately, emotions that are resisted don’t disappear—they stay stored in the body and resurface as stress, anxiety, depression, or fatigue.
2. The Cost of Avoidance
Emotional avoidance may provide temporary relief, but over time it creates deeper disconnection. You might notice:
Feeling tired or heavy, even with rest
Difficulty finding joy or meaning in daily life
Mental fog and chronic overthinking
Emotional flatness—being “fine” but not fulfilled
This pattern isn’t just psychological; it’s physiological. Suppressed emotions interrupt the body’s natural rhythm of feel → process → release, leading to emotional stagnation and burnout.
3. How to Feel Again
Healing from emotional numbness doesn’t mean forcing yourself to cry or feel everything at once. It means creating emotional safety in small, sustainable steps:
Name what’s happening. Try saying, “I notice I’m distracting myself because I feel anxious.” Awareness begins the healing process.
Feel in small windows. Set a timer for 30 seconds and simply observe where emotion sits in your body—tight chest, heavy shoulders, fluttering stomach.
Move your energy. Journaling, walking, breathwork, or gentle movement all help emotion flow again. These practices are forms of somatic release—they transform emotional energy into motion.
Seek safe connection. Healing accelerates when we’re seen without judgment. Working with a Registered Professional Counsellor in Saskatoon—or virtually—can help you build emotional resilience and re-learn how to process feelings safely.
4. The Return of Aliveness
As you reconnect with your emotions, you’ll start noticing subtle shifts: music feels richer, laughter feels authentic, even tears carry purpose. Emotional awareness awakens the very energy you once thought you lost.
Feeling is not a weakness; it’s a sign you’re alive again.
Closing Message
If you’ve been living on autopilot, remember this: your numbness was a wise response to overwhelm. It kept you safe until you were ready to heal.
That readiness—the simple curiosity to feel again—is your turning point.
And if you’d like a safe space to explore that process, I offer in-person and virtual counselling in Saskatoon for adults navigating stress, anxiety, depression, and trauma recovery.
Visit www.pierrebegrandcounselling.com to book a free 20-minute discovery call or learn more about how therapy can help you reconnect with yourself and your life.
By Pierre Begrand, Registered Professional Counsellor | Pierre Begrand Counselling, Saskatoon SK
